Rangimarie Mules: Never let a chance to connect go by

Rangimarie Mules. Picture / Supplied

At Whiria te Muka, we are working on carving out a space that allows us to embed a culture of noticing, of connecting ... When you walk down the street, how many times have you noticed the person you just walked past? I mean, truly noticed them? Looked at them as a miracle, an accumulation of unique experiences or circumstances, past and present?

Perhaps they are somebody's loved one, a father, aunty, partner or child. But you're late and you've got many things on your list to get done — "I'll do it later." But later often never comes. What we didn't realise is that we just walked passed a whole world, with a viewpoint unlike anybody else's. This is all too often how I feel when walking through town. I just didn't notice. I wished I had taken more time to connect, to manaaki, to care about more than my own tasks.

But if we never stop to notice the people we share our place with, how can we ever connect? How are we ever meant to build a sense of empathy or understanding towards those who need it most? Did they smile at me? Did I even look at them? I wonder what their story is. I wonder what they hide from the gaze of public life. But how can I help anyway? I'm just one person, right?

Whānau harm is often embedded into the fabric of our society. It runs deep, hidden in the private spaces of our homes. And the I just don't have time right now mentality seems to be a common refrain.

Whānau harm, in its many forms, impacts us all in some way, whether it be through our own immediate whānau or our wider community interactions. Left hidden, whānau harm will continue to grow within the private lives of our homes, in the depths of the emotions of our people, possibly even unconsciously passed on from generation to generation. I believe it is one of the biggest threats to our vitality as individuals, communities and society. Furthermore, it is an abuse on our mana.

At Whiria te Muka, we are working on carving out a space that allows us to embed a culture of noticing, of connecting, of building an authentic sense of empathy for those who make up our unique communities. We believe that in order to address the complexities of whānau harm, our whānau voices, experiences and perspectives have to be valued as the leading reo in supporting healthy, empowered people across Te Hiku.

My role with Whiria is to build capabilities, strategies and provoke critical thinking through the use of social innovation and creative, solution-based approaches. Alongside the incredible team of kaimahi — Te Hiku iwi and NZ Police — I work to bring our community's voices to the forefront, to encourage our people to be the designers for our futures, and, ultimately, to build a collective legacy we are all proud of.

Kia whiria te muka tangata — Weaving together the fibres of Te Hiku communities into a strong, healthy and enduring strand — is both an inspirational and daunting task. But if we never surface, confront and design our futures the way we aspire them to be then we will never know what could have been. What it was we should have noticed.

These are our people, our places. It's now our time to take collective ownership and shape a world that cares, heals and takes notice of the miracle walking down the street.

He muka tangata tātou. We are all a woven people.