With Tim Eves
When Muhammad Ali claimed he was so quick he could switch the lights off and be in bed before it was dark, nobody really bothered making a query. Probably because he was joking, or at least, we thought he was.
In the world of sport, making outrageous claims has always been part of the tapestry, especially when it comes to the big event. Name your sport ... boxing, cricket, rugby, anything to do with American sports, they all have a history of overstating the obvious.
But they all might pale in comparison to what organisers of the Beijing Olympics reckon they will achieve come August next year.
These people say the Beijing Olympics will not only be clean, but also they will be green. Yeah, right, and Graham Henry said he could win the ... . oh, look, let's not even go there.
Who really knows what China is capable of, but turning a city the size of Beijing into some sort of eco-friendly, organic haven must surely rank as a flight on fancy of massive proportions.
Beijing is a major transportation hub, with dozens of railways, roads and motorways passing through the city; is recognised as the political, educational, and cultural centre of the People's Republic of China; and is home to 12 million people. Sorry, but 12 million people? Now that's a lot of, errr, effluent, even before they start their cars up in the morning.
The main trouble, though, is not just that the 12 million inhabitants of Beijing make a bit of a mess, but that the five million people who live in regions thereabouts work in heavy industry factories, many powered by coal. The result? A daily wave of smog that rolls into the city. A big swirling cloud of toxicity.
When there is no rain or wind, ozone and fine dust accumulate, often to a rate that is two or three times the maximum levels recommended by the World Health Organisation (WHO).
Nevertheless, Beijing's city government steadfastly believes in its "Green Games". Money has been no object. Household heating methods have been changed, a Beijing steel mill is currently being relocated and chemicals fired into the atmosphere and dropped out of aeroplanes.
But get this: "If you exercise," advises Ibrahim Salahat of the International Medical Center in Beijing, "you should do it inside."
Right then, that will make the Olympic marathon an interesting exercise, ditto the triathlon, rowing, kayaking and equestrian events.
Exactly how Beijing Olympic organisers plan to remedy air pollution remains the big mystery, and has already been the cause of much contemplation by New Zealand Olympic officials.
Endurance athletes spend hours performing at peak levels in the open air, inhaling up to 150 litres of air a minute - more than 10 times as much as a sedentary office worker. Ozone and fine dust can cause inflammation that requires treatment with asthma and anti-inflammatory drugs. So New Zealand athletes are being prepared accordingly. They will be armed with "ice-suits" to battle the heat. There are plans for custom-designed sports drinks and work is progressing on new abbreviated methods to warm-up, called "priming techniques" that will lessen the time athletes will need to be exposed to the elements.
Not that Beijing will be the first Olympic host city with environmental problems. Athens (2004), Los Angeles (1984) and Mexico City (1968) aren't exactly known for their pristine air. In Los Angeles, British runner Steve Ovett collapsed with respiratory problems after the 800-metre race. Ovett is convinced that pollution was the culprit.
But whatever the measures taken to protect the 10,000 athletes, what about the spectators? Several million tickets have sold for Olympic events already.
A few million sports fanatics on holiday in Beijing? Just like the clean green claims from the orgainsers, that's one big pile of effluent.
SPORTSRITE - There's some real dirt hanging over the Beijing Olympics
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