Roger Moroney: Survey reveals it's all in the way you say it

If the Kiwi accent is the sexiest in the world, who better to put forward as an example, than Barry Crump?

It is a most eye-catching term. And through the course of time, relatively recent time, it has become a very commonly used term.

'According to a new survey ...'

There is always a new survey being carried out ... somewhere.

Surveys about everything and anything. Where hundreds or thousands of people are somehow lured into giving an answer on a subject or issue which is very often subjective.

Kind of like voting I guess.

Oh, and there is another term which is associated with this 'according to a new survey' issue.

'According to the results ...'

I mean you can read anything you like into surveys, especially the lighter topic affairs, because I tend to suspect that some people who agree to take part in 'a new survey' often drop in the occasional out-of-left-field answer ... just for a bit of fun.

So I tend to take them with a grain of salt. Whatever that means.

These 'new survey' jobs are out there with that other eye-catching little number that goes 'research has shown' and they're beauts.

One week it's don't drink wine then a fortnight later it's by all means imbibe some as 'research has shown' it's good for the ticker.

I reckon they need to have a survey asking people if they believe everything they read in 'a new survey'.

Particularly in the wake of one the latest new surveys which has been doing the rounds.

Apparently, yes apparently, this new survey has determined that the New Zealand accent has been named the sexiest in the world.

I had to read that twice.

Now, I'm proud to be a Kiwi, of course, and I admire the way that despite our modest size we have staked a strong place in the world of sports, trade and tourism.

But I've never considered the language we use, and the sound of it, as verbally alluring.

It was pointed out that the Kiwi accent was that used by the likes of Lorde and Keith Urban, which is fine and dandy.

Apparently Lorde is a good example of the accent that is thought of as "Kiwi".

But it's also the accent which was used by Barry Crump and a nationwide army of people who (unlike the cooing Italian and French) roll out "howzit goin'?" when meeting up, or "ah gidday'.

The survey was carried out by an on-line travel site.

They polled about 8500 people from 60 countries far and wide.

The summation after all was counted and all was said and done ... and surveyed?

Well, seems our accent is "outrageously charming" and surged to the number one spot as the sexiest accent in the world.

In second place was the South African language and third was the Irish lilt.

My own summation was more to the point.

"They're crazy."

Because Italy came in fourth.

Fourth?

However, there was a note attached to this historic and most beautiful language's fourth place finish.

"Any word in Italian sounds sexy," it was stated, as if to mean it didn't count because there would be no contest otherwise.

Crikey ... come on.

So if you're working in a pie shop and a Kiwi bloke wanders in and says "giviss a steak 'n cheese pie thanks mate".

Three minutes mater an Italian bloke walks in and says "good-a morning my friend ... may I pleaser have a one of your de-alightful steak and cheese-a pies?"

Struth, even if you were a happily married bloke you'd probably ask him out for a quiet drink.

I have spoken to several Italian chaps of the motor racing ilk and their accent is a delightful work of verbal art.

But hey, at the end of the day the language we adopted from our various sources during history has been recognised globally ... albeit by a fraction of the world populace.

But we'll take it, and it kind of puts to bed those times in the '50s and '60s when broadcasters and the emerging television front people honed their tones toward Britain rather than what most of the general populace were using.

And hey, the Aussie accent only got fifth.

And here's where it all got weird again because also making the top 10 were Southern US and Brazilian Portuguese.

I'll go with the south of the US given Willie Nelson is from down that way and he sounds pretty cool, but has anyone ever heard Brazilian Portuguese lately?

And the English accent?

It came in 12th.

Scottish?

Sixth.

Icelandic?

Zilch.

So there it was.

Another new survey and another result which can be filed under a fine slice of Kiwi lingo-accent-language ... "yeah right".