May Seager felt she'd dodged a bullet after surviving breast cancer the first time around. Photo / Michael Cunningham
When May Seager turned 45 and was eligible for free breast screening, she was there in a shot.
Having already had a cancer scare, the Northlander was proactive when it came to health.
Seager's mum, from the Cook Islands, had her as a teen and so she was raised by her grandmother, as is common among their culture. But when her grandmother suddenly died of cervical cancer, her world turned upside down.
"I was 9 when my grandmother died so I went to live with mum and dad who by then were married with two other children. I joined the family and didn't find out my grandmother had died from cancer until I came across her death certificate in my 30s.
"I thought that was odd as she didn't smoke, as that was all I associated it with. She died at the age I am now – 55 and bringing up a child. I realised I was at high risk of cervical cancer so became quite proactive and had some tests."
Tests turned up abnormal cells which she had successful treatment for.
"It wasn't a problem anymore but what it did was it heightened my awareness of how important screening is. So, when I came up to 45, I was all ready and looking forward to it [the breast screen]."
When she was called back, Seager remembers her husband saying they don't call you back for nothing.
"I thought, 'Oh nah, don't be silly, it'll be fine'. But I knew it was a possibility."
A ductal carcinoma in situ was found and was so tiny, Seager said there is no way she could have found it herself.
"Even after they told me where it was, I couldn't find it."
The mother of four was given a mastectomy, along with a breast reconstruction, which was deemed a success and the then manager for a Pacific Islands organisation, carried on with life, becoming the Pacific Island champion for breast screening.
"I was just thankful I had dodged a bullet. I still had kids at primary. I was just really thankful that I could still be around to raise my family."
But late 2016, one of her arms became sore and swollen. A mammogram detected a mass under her arm on the same side she'd had the mastectomy. A biopsy showed two lumps with another two later developing in the neck area.
Diagnosed with metastatic secondary advanced breast cancer, Seager began chemotherapy for three months, alongside taking the drugs Perjeta, Docetaxel and Herceptin.
She describes the treatment as "pretty tough going".
"You know it's coming but nothing prepares you, to be honest. There were days I couldn't move. But they gave me a journal and encouraged me to write it down. It was really good because it helped me to see the trend. In the middle of the three-week cycle, I would be at my absolute bottom and, from my journal, I could see the dips and highs."
During treatment, the four lumps disappeared. However, at the final consultation, May was delivered a further blow; the cancer had spread to her hip and lungs, which explained the cough she had developed.
"I was all dressed up in celebratory-mode thinking I wouldn't be coming back [to the clinic for treatment]."
However, in true May Seager spirit, her philosophy was: "It could be worse.
"I could be dead. I should have been dead by 40. I don't like to dwell on the what-ifs. I'm just really grateful that I'm still here and I'm very well supported by my family and friends, and the staff at the Jim Carney Centre are fabulous, along with Sweet Louise."
Sweet Louise is a New Zealand charity dedicated to improving the quality of life for Kiwis living with incurable breast cancer. It currently supports more than 745 New Zealanders and their families providing emotional and social support, as well as practical support with access to ready-made meals, transport costs for hospital visits, and home and garden help.
October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month.
About 3000 people a year are diagnosed with breast cancer in New Zealand with almost 30 per cent of people diagnosed with primary breast cancer going on to develop incurable breast cancer. Once diagnosed with incurable breast cancer, the average life expectancy in New Zealand is less than two years. A diagnosis of incurable (also known as advanced, stage four, secondary or metastatic) cancer means the cancer cannot be cured, but often it can be controlled, sometimes for many years. Those with incurable breast cancer will be in treatment for the rest of their lives.
There are currently around 40 women with stage four breast cancer in Northland. Seager's is classed as stage four but she doesn't dwell on that.
"I've likened it to having a party in my house, like Kelly Brown. People don't understand why I'm still having treatment and I say, 'Well, that's to stop the cancer having a party in my house.'
"It's a part of my life but I don't want it to be the only part of my life."
Alongside the Perjeta and Herceptin, she travels from Maungaturoto every three weeks to undergo chemotherapy.
"Herceptin gives you an average of 10 years. It's keeping it at bay. I have to do my part in eating well, not drinking much alcohol and keeping on top of my immune system."
Seager said she doesn't have a bucket list.
"I've still got a home and a family to live with so I don't want to blow everything on big holidays. Besides, it's too soon for a bucket list. I have been given an expiry year but I'm aiming to go past that. Research is evolving and, meanwhile, I've got to make everything count. That is making sure that I connect with my family, friends and community more often than I did in the past, not taking people for granted. I want to keep those connections so they're not just a Christmas card once a year."
Seager, now a self-employed community adviser, said the main things keeping her going are her family, faith and culture - the latter she has been delving into so her children understand their heritage and meanwhile, she has become an advocate for health awareness.
"My advice is don't ignore it, get on to it. I'm always harping on about it but I'm doing it from a place of love and experience and they [family] sort of humour me ... then they go to the doctor's the next week.
"Prevention is better than the other end and I'm not quite at the other end. There is a proverb in the Cook Islands language that says, "The tree that is often challenged by the wind, develops strong roots."
Foundations of Sweet Louise
Sweet Louise was established in 2005 by Scott Perkins and named after his wife Louise who passed away in 2004 after living for 10 years with incurable breast cancer. Louise was diagnosed with incurable cancer at age 29. This didn't stop her living life to the full for more than 10 years. Her philosophy of doing something positive for herself every day laid the foundations for Sweet Louise.
More information can be found at: www.sweetoctober.nz
I visited Budapest last in the 1980s when it was under communist rule.