The scary season is upon us again. Photo / 123RF
OPINION
Boo!
The scary season is upon us again. Halloween is here to stay in Aotearoa, well … if the extensive displays in Arthur’s are anything to go by!
In the United States this day is seen as a party opportunity in which you show off your ironic sense of humour and cutting-edge tastelessness – this year look out for … Barbie, Oppenheimer, Cocaine Bear, Tanya from White Lotus.
Back home we are a little more traditional in our approach, still honing in on the ghoulish and spooky theme.
My moko has her costume prepared – a somewhat cheeky-looking devil to offset her friend appearing as an angel.
Previous outfits have included a pumpkin, a ghost and a witch - good traditional stuff. One year she was insisting on being a ‘bloody banana’ - but this was a little ambitious and horrifying sounding to reach fruition.
So, all has been quiet on the political front as those special votes are tallied, but surely something should be ready to be revealed around about our Halloween season? And what kind of scary line-up I wonder will be delivered?
The first cab off the rank has got to be our new prime minister, whose Halloween alter ego is surely Doctor Evil from the Austin Powers movie franchise. I can just see him, little finger poised at the edge of his mouth, as he repeats the mantra, ‘up to $250 per week’.
This, all while his predecessor, Chippy, licks his wounds and plans a dastardly revenge inhabiting the persona of a vengeful Chucky, the evil, knife-wielding doll.
Meanwhile, lurking in the bowels of the Beehive is the omnipresent Dracula, whose powers do not diminish with the passing of time - Count Winston.
Rubbing his hands and gleefully biding his time, he silently prowls the labyrinth of Parliament. But bustling in front of Winston comes a twerking scarecrow-like figure: David Seymour is staking his claim to the Yellow Brick Road.
His straw-like hair and eyebrows elevate with anticipation, as finally he feels closer than ever to the great Wizard of OZ. But minding the gates to the palace is a malevolent matriarch, yes, the Wicked Witch Willis with her glowing green complexion.
But she’s not the greenest creature at the Halloween Ball. The doomsday revellers Chloe and co are also triumphant participants frolicking perhaps with a new batch of party revellers in town, courtesy of Te Pāti Māori.
So what will our Monster Mash line-up of power be, when the jostling and hustling have ceased (albeit temporarily)? Who will head up the Halloween headlines?
Whatever the combination, we will no doubt enjoy the thrill of terror as all is revealed.
Be afraid, be very afraid!
Jonny Wilkinson is the CEO of Tiaho Trust - Disability A Matter of Perception, a Whangārei-based disability advocacy organisation.
'You don’t want to be doom and gloom your whole life. That's just a miserable way to live'