"He's my children's dad, and he's locked away. That's not nice for them to know about their father."
She also worries "that I didn't protect my children when they were little".
The rapes and beatings started a few months into their marriage and ended only when she left four years ago.
As her children grew older they encouraged her to speak out against the brutality.
Just before the marriage ended she saw the "It's not okay" anti-violence campaign on TV, and went as far as looking it up online. Fear that someone would come knocking on the door asking questions, or even contact Titford, frightened her off. But eventually she did follow through and was helped - "saved" - by Women's Refuge.
Cochrane understands the dynamic of control her angry, vengeful husband exerted on her. She finds it hard to believe now that she was so meek.
That's changing. The other day she complained to One News about an online headline that called her a "sex slave". She wasn't, but there were times she was raped, she says. And then jokes, "I was a slave though. I worked really hard on those farms and now I've got nothing to show for it."
She believes Titford set out to keep his young, shy wife isolated on their farm on the rugged coast 40 minutes north of Dargaville, then on other farms they had in Tasmania and Northland.
She had no friends, couldn't go into town on her own, and even being invited for a cuppa with a neighbour meant Titford would go too.
In a bid to increase compensation from the Government - Te Roroa had a longstanding Waitangi Tribunal land claim on a small part of the farm - Titford tried to frame the iwi for the vandalism and other crimes he committed, even torching his own house. Now he is locked away, with arson among the many convictions, although he was found not guilty of burning down another house on the farm.
A flicker of pain creases Cochrane's face as she talks about those lonely years, when people he was harming had extended a hand of friendship to her.
"The claimants invited me to join a playgroup but he wouldn't let me. I suppose he thought if I got away from him, I'd say too much."
Cochrane says Titford's victims included his extended family who suffered from the publicity his high profile disputes generated.
Her own parents, who died two years ago, "had an idea" things were bad but Titford made dreadful threats should she tell them. Her brother and sister-in-law gave evidence at his trial, and Titford was found guilty of a threatening-to-kill charge related to those threats.
There were good times in the marriage, Cochrane recollects. Like when her babies were born; a love he could not take away. Then there was the time he took the family on holiday in Australia ... but, no, on reflection, she says, it wasn't that great. It's a wonder others in the hotel didn't hear the children screaming when their father completely lost it with them.
"They've been emotionally damaged, but they're doing well, they're wonderful kids," she says of the brood ranging from 21-years-old to 7.
Eventually Cochrane hopes she won't be afraid of the sound of a man's angrily raised voice. She's doing a travel and tourism course because one day she'd like to work, but would love to go farming again.
She's renting a cottage on the outskirts of Hikurangi, near where she grew up. Two Northland properties she and Titford own and an Australian one they have an interest in are tied up in a trust - but she was bankrupted, and he gained full control of the trust.
"It's another way he has power over me," she shrugs. "I'm no longer a trustee, just a beneficiary."
It will take a long time to sort out, "and we're living in poverty while all these assets are tied up. I keep dreaming about the house I could have had, a place to call home."
But Cochrane isn't complaining.
"I knew it would be hard going through this court case. I knew when I started this thing rolling that the whole story would unravel, but I'm amazed at the support I'm getting from people."
There are wrongs she wishes she could put right, though.
"Especially with Te Roroa. I'd really like to go over there to meet them face to face and apologise in person."
