Eva Bradley: Sobering reality kicks in

Eva Bradley

Cause and effect is one of the first things we learn as we develop.

On a daily basis my baby is learning each small action has a reaction and there are consequences to most things he does. If he pulls his dummy out of his mouth, he won't be able to get it back in, for instance.

Since these lessons start so young for us, it amazes me that as adults we are still so wholly unable to learn from them and adjust our behaviour accordingly.

I'm talking about the hangover many of us will have experienced on New Year's Day.

Instead of celebrating a fresh start and heralding in the dawn of a new day and year, a goodly portion of us are instead wishing for a do-over so we could have one drink or 10 fewer than we did in the lead-up to midnight.

Last New Year's Eve I was feeling sorry for myself because I was unable to drink. This time I had my first mini-bender in more than a year and I can definitely report my self-pity as a result of being able to drink is significantly higher than when I couldn't.

The age-old question is a simple one: why do we do it? If we can land on the moon why is it such a stretch to impose a little bit of self-control?

Universally we regret the next day what went down the night before and yet the experience never seems quite horrific enough to teach us to slow down next time.

"All things in moderation" sounds easy enough but, as with so many things in life including the consumption of alcohol, it is a fine balance that often tips the wrong way on the scales.

The older I get, the less appealing it seems to load myself to the brim with a substance that makes me feel sick the next day and do embarrassing salsa dancing demonstrations the night before.

Especially when I have to get up at 6am to feed a baby who has very little grasp yet of the phrase, "Mummy needs a sleep-in." Thanks to being a bit of a light-weight, I never remember the alleged "awesome night" I had while under the influence, so it all does really seem incredibly pointless.

Yet choosing to stay sober on New Year's Eve is about as socially acceptable in New Zealand as farting upwind.

Again, I have to ask why. Why is it that we can't be seen to be having a good time unless it is artificially lubricated by alcohol? When I was 16 and able to talk my way into bars but not drink in them, I used to have the most awesome nights on the dance floor and have great times with my friends while completely sober.

Over the past year while pregnant and then breastfeeding, I've been forced to return to those sober nights out and, after an initial adjustment period, I have to say it was generally just great to have a valid reason to avoid being hungover. My Sunday mornings were reclaimed and my weekend productivity soared.

Now, as I sit here nursing a sore head and queasy stomach while trying to write and stay upbeat for a baby who has no interest in going to sleep, I'm beginning to wonder if next New Year I may just sneak some cordial into my wine glass instead of champagne and pretend to be an idiot so I blend in.

-Eva Bradley is an award-winning columnist and photographer, who runs Napier-based Eva Bradley Photography.