Most client forms want to know if a woman has a legally-tethered male about the house, says Christine Allen
Most modern women roll their eyes when they think about it.
"Please tick Miss, Mrs or Ms." Oh, the Pride and Prejudice of it all.
From beauty therapists to dentists, most client forms want to know if a woman has a legally-tethered male about the house.
Why does a dentist need to know if I'm married? Will it make my fillings cheaper?
It's archaic. Men are Mr - whether with a signed-up bed partner or not.
People are obsessed with knowing the age and occupation of others, as well as the marital status of women. It's like a dog sniffing every corner of a room before settling down in the middle.
Gyms have these check boxes too.
Perhaps a certain type of member appreciates the heads up.
Those sweaty, male gym-goers who perch themselves at workout stations, sniffing after women who would rather be left to their leg raises in peace.
Legs akimbo, I once lifted for my 20th sit-up, sweat pumping from my beet-red face.
And there he was - standing over me. He was no Mr Darcy.
I tolerated the chat-up attempt of the wide-eyed, middle-aged gym stalker for 10 more sit ups, until he proffered a final blow - a verbal pat on the bottom for my athletic ability delivered with a sleazy comment about my physique.
I snapped and told him to "Bugger off - I'm married".
"Well, you should wear a ring to let people know? That's what they're for," he barked.
My response was more offensive than the gym floor's combined body odour.
He tottered off, fuming, his face flushed.
We sometimes get feedback from annoyed readers, or subjects of our stories, questioning our style of written honorific - Miss, Mrs or Ms.
Ms became popular in the 1950s as the marital status was unknown or irrelevant.
Miss comes from the word mistress in the 1600s and is still used for young, unmarried women. It's condescending.
Mrs sounds like I should have 10 children and 15 cats.
My marital status is my own business but I still like people to know I'm female.
I just don't have enough cats to be called Mrs.
The worker logged 437 hours in five weeks - all of which was unpaid.