Going to ground with paving

My first effort at paving involved laying 10,000 second-hand bricks on our driveway in Dunedin in the 80s.
It took well over a year - not because we ran out of steam, but because we ran out of bricks weekly and had to drive all over Otago and Southland to find new stock. Every Sunday drive involved "brick-spotting" and even a stack of half-a-dozen unused bricks in someone's backyard was like gold to us.
We laid them in a herringbone pattern in sand, on a slope, without skill, information or knowledge and drove two cars and a motorcycle over them every day. To the best of my knowledge, they're still there.
The beauty of our second-hand bricks was that the rougher they got, the better they looked. Sadly, for those of us who specialise in sloppy DIY, such is not the case with the paving style of today, something we are quickly discovering as we begin to pave an area that has been covered in lime chip.
The major requirement for our new paved area is that it be almost level.
I say almost because we live in a region where it rains a lot and we need a slight slope on the pavers to direct excess water in the right direction.
We're tired of paddling through four inches of water to get to the carport.
My partner likes level.
He also likes things to be done properly, so he has researched the topic exhaustively on the internet and collected brochures on paving from every hardware store in Northland.
It's astonishing how much more simple a job becomes when you know what you're doing.
The first rule is function before form. It's one I've always had difficulty with, which explains the number of really cool-looking things around our place that don't actually work, and the fact that the builder is replacing my very arty mosaic shower which has been leaking for the past decade.
Our new pavers are plain, smooth concrete, of suitable finish and thickness for patios and paths.
We've also learned the following:
•If you're not buying pavers all from the same batch, mix and match so any slight differences won't be so noticeable.
•Mark out the area with a string line so there will be no nasty surprises at the end.
•Allow a slope of 30mm per metre so the water can run off.
•If they're adjoining the house, building regulations will require pavers to be a minimum height below floor level.
•Depending on the surface you're laying your pavers on, you may need a base course, the thickness of which will depend on the underlying material. That's followed by bedding sand, but don't pop down to the beach for a trailer-load - you need coarse river sand.
•Lay the pavers with a gap of 2mm to 4mm between them. And - who would have thought it - start at the bottom if you're laying them on a slope.
Lay the whole pavers first and cut and lay part-pavers later.
•Once they're down, you'll need to compact the pavers over the whole area. With a small area, you'll get away with a rubber hammer and a length of heavy timber.
But for a big area, you'll need to hire a plate compacter.
•Finally, sweep joint sand (not the same as bedding sand) over the area and compact again to drive sand into the joints.
A vast area of perfectly laid square pavers may appeal to those who like straight and level, but if you're the type who has a mosaic cabbage tree in the shower, it may not do the business.
I'm negotiating for edging plants, pebble channels and mondo grass squares to break up what may be a large expanse of glaring, blinding white. I'm also trying to talk The Partner into incorporating different-coloured pavers to make a hopscotch grid, but I'm not quite there with that idea yet.