We all manage grief in separate ways

We usually associate grief with bereavement.

OPINION

Coping with grief is different for all of us and although there is some helpful advice we can use or give others; we all have our own method of dealing with grief.

Grief can be associated with various experiences in our lives. While we tend to associate it with the bereavement of someone close or even a family pet, it can be a relationship breakup, finding out about a terminal illness, losing your job, or even selling your family home, just to name a few.

Look after yourself

Personally, I have lost a child, husband, mother, grandparents, precious pets, as well as friends and in each case, I have dealt with the grief in many ways.

Whatever the situation, I would say to anyone, the number one thing is to look after yourself ... or have someone stay and look after you for a while, especially if you are on your own.

Even though there will be days when you don’t want to get up or get dressed, make yourself do it. Put on a bright colourful jumper and some lippy, I can assure you that it will make all the difference

Friends

A friend with a good listening ear who lets you get things off your chest is always a good friend - one who knows when it is the right time to offer caring words.

Do not make any major changes straight away, you need some clear space and time to process things.

You are going to feel like you are on a roller coaster for quite a while, and this is fine. My way of coping at various times has been to get stuck into the garden. I must admit that I never had my garden so weed-free and the vegetable garden so well planted as I did then, but it was just what I needed.

Friends are going to want to offer you their condolences and some find it hard, but let them, as they want to show you they care.

Added help

If it all gets too overwhelming, check out if you have some grief counsellors in your area. Also, remember your doctor will be able to offer helpful advice to help you through this sad time.

Make sure you get out and get some exercise, even if it is just a walk around the block or along the beach. Pets are always a comfort when you are coping with grief, and they seem to be able to sense when you need extra comfort.

Remember

Grieving is an individual experience and there is no right or wrong way to grieve. How you grieve depends on so many factors including your personality, your coping style, your life experience, your faith, and how significant the loss was to you. This will take time.

Healing is something that happens gradually. For some, you will start to feel better in weeks or months and for others, the grieving process is measured in years. Whatever your grief experiences, it’s important to be patient with yourself and allow the process to naturally unfold.