Roger Moroney: Wicked blokes need to rein it in

Roger Moroney.

So, just what does "offensive" mean?

I want to get this right before I label this certain thing as offensive.

So I looked it up in the big dictionary here with the old torn cover, which reveals its age nicely ... sort of like me really.

"Unpleasant or disgusting as to the senses - insulting - causing anger or annoyance."

Okey dokey, that sounds pretty well right then.

In the towns of Whangarei and Queenstown there are rumblings afoot, and I daresay as the rumblings spread, other centres will also start to raise a voice or two.

It's all about being offended by what's out on the streets and the lanes and the highways and the avenues ... and the carparks and motorcamps of course.

Namely, rental vans.

Particular vans with what one could describe as attitude.

Vans which have created those rumbles in Whangarei and Queenstown.

You have likely seen them as they are very colourful and very provocative ... although the provocative ones are the mild ones.

I guess the bunch who initially set this company up in Australia could have called it Offensive Campers but then that would have cut to the chase far too quickly. So they tagged them "wicked" instead. Wicked Campers.

It sounds a lot more twee and cheeky and allows people to make up their own minds if what the clowns paint across them is wicked, nasty, obscene or just plain ... offensive.

Now don't go getting the idea that age has sullied my sense of humour or that the thickness of my skin has thinned out considerably over the past few years, but I do find some of these supposedly funny designs ... offensive, and the first thing I do is associate them immediately with the occupants, as by taking the wheel of one of these things they are effectively endorsing the messages upon it.

Which effectively means they might be either sex offenders or drug addicts, in some extreme van design cases.

Not an association I would find in the least bit amusing while touring someone else's town or country in a rented van.

I once travelled in one with a badly drawn picture of Mick Jagger on the back ... that was bad enough.

But people are hiring these offensive vehicles, which is a bit of a worry because anyone who finds it funny to drive around in a van showing Snow White inhaling drugs with the tagline "crack - enjoy" has got to be a saddo and not someone I would share a bar with.

And one insinuating that the only girl you want in your van is one who will - I can't type out the rest because it's foul, infantile and just plain offensive.

Put it this way. These are slogans and designs created clearly by blokes with a dodgy concept of what is acceptable in public and what is not.

I cannot see the point, except that the company which wheels these things out does so at a bargain price. It is a cheap way to travel, as it is an effective way to cheapen the souls of the occupants.

So it's probably no surprise that I have spotted two over the past fortnight which have drawn the attention of either the hirers or passersby who found the colourful scrawls upon them offensive.

There had been a sprayed application of grey undercoat paint over words someone (rightly) took offence to.

I mean, if you painted your house using the supposedly humorous daubings these Wicked Camper crews use, and you lived near a primary school, would it take long for "the authorities" to sort of step in and have a word? They'd surely be in faster than you could curse.

Yet it has been reported that it is currently unclear whether there are any legal powers which could be used to get this company to pull back and once again come and live with us in the land of Inoffensive.

However, the powers of Queenstown are using an existing district plan rule which is used to regulate signs on buildings to effectively fine the company if an offensively decorated van hits town.

And Whangarei MP Shane Reti wants the dodgy ones sent packing, having received complaints about them.

This whole freedom-campers thing is slightly edgy at the best of times ... this camper company ain't doing it no favours.

- Roger Moroney is an award-winning journalist for Hawke's Bay Today and observer of the slightly off-centre.