This audio dilemma is a common one and while it does not have an official name in Latin or something like that, I have come up with one...purely because I had nothing better to do at the time.
Like trying to make sense of some reality "survivor" TV shows about people marooned on an island, although the film crew managed to get marooned with them of course.
So there was an unsourced and annoying sound in the car interior which I was determined to locate and placate.
I was very practical and commonsensical about this mission.
I staunchly determined that something was causing it.
Bravo.
But here's the thing.
When you're driving along and there is a buzz being emitted "somewhere" it's impossible to draw a straight line bead toward it.
I figured it was coming from the glovebox region so, using what little initiative I do possess, I emptied the thing...just in case something tiny and metallic and loose was afoot in there.
But still it persisted.
"There's a screw loose," a bloke I was talking to about it remarked.
Slightly put out, I said I may have the occasional less than lucid moment but overall my head was in a reasonable state.
"Fitting screw," he sighed.
"Something's vibrated loose...you need to get it looked at because something could come away...and you don't know what it might be."
I insisted it was obviously not an engine mount so I wasn't too worried.
I was just annoyed by its buzzing presence.
The thing with car dashboards is that everything (like fixture joints and screws and things) are sort of tucked away from sight so I take the rational approach.
I give every plastic surface and moulding a good thump with the fist in the vain hope the impact may lodge two sparring pieces together. Which I did.
The few little screw points I did spot were attended to, but they were all tight anyway...but it pays one to check.
I also flipped up the bonnet to have a quick squizz around the back of the engine bay in case anything was loose in there.
Buzzing sounds can travel you know. But all appeared fine and well.
So then, back to the interior which I further dealt to be squirting that ultra-fine lube spray stuff along the otherwise tight joins.
I then fired up the engine and let it settle into an idle and listened for something I did not want to listen to.
There was still a slight buzzing from that damned front left of the dashboard zone so I went back to Plan A...but this time the fist thumps were a tad more aggressive.
I heard something metallic ping onto something plastic and the buzzing disappeared.
I was overjoyed and told myself I should have been a mechanic.
The fact there now appears to be a slight gap at the back of the glovebox and it is difficult to close properly is irrelevant.
*Roger Moroney is an award-winning journalist for Hawke's Bay Today and observer of the slightly off-centre.