Kiwi comic Mike King was at Flaxmere College last night to discuss positive parenting. Photo / Paul Taylor
The Kiwi king of comedy was in town last night but the message he brought with him was far from a laughing matter.
About 100 members of the Flaxmere community attended comedian Mike King's free practical parenting evening at Flaxmere College.
Mr King spoke about suicide prevention, giving children hope and his battles with drugs, alcohol and depression.
He urged parents to change the parenting game.
One of the biggest issues facing families these days was a lack of communication.
"We have lost the trust of our children," he said.
"If you want your children to talk to you about their problems, you have to role-model that behaviour yourself."
Growing up in a staunch Maori world, he had the notion of "harden up" ingrained into him.
His sense of self-worth came from making others laugh, often at the expense of someone else.
"A lot of people thought I was an arrogant dick."
He spoke of the internal struggle between his inner devil and angel, leading to some poor decisions over the years.
He implored children affected by mental illness to seek the help they needed.
He described the current generation as "the most amazing generation in the history of the world", with his own being "the worst parents in the history of the world".
"It's not because we are bad people but because we love and risk manage our children too much.
"This stifles them. The kids have the answers but are not being heard."
He said children lived two lives - "the one in front of us, where they tell you everything you want to hear, and the real one where they talk to the people they trust most in the world."
"Our kids are amazing but we aren't doing best by them by risk-managing them."
"The children don't need to change, we need to change.
"This may be difficult because if there is one thing our generation fears most, it's change."
Paunovic moved to Havelock North with her family from Croatia seven years ago.