Flying through the biggest 'theatre' there is

Just another "armed" day on stage for a couple of the Heathrow airport cast.

COMMENT
As evidenced by the number of "out on the range" themed shows, animals are very entertaining.

Especially animals in the wild because they can be a tad unpredictable.

And any animal show with the word "Attenborough" attached to it can be relied upon to be in possession of the three 'e's.

Enlightening, educational and entertaining.

There's a bit of a dearth of them presently, but like a hyena with the whiff of a struggling zebra they'll soon make an appearance again.

However, they have a way to go to catch up with their entertaining "colleagues" called people, for it is people of course who create the bulk of the entertainment landscape of television.

Mind you, the crews who make entertaining programmes about animals have recognised that the "stars" of their productions don't have to be paid.

And they are not members of any entertainment collective union nor do they have agents or public relations staff who need to be consulted for permission to show scenes where their bottoms come into focus.

So anyway, yep, people are entertaining.

Since the days when stages were the platforms for skilled and gifted folk, when television was still centuries from being discovered, people have been acting, seeking laughter, doing tricks or leaping about in leotards all in the name of providing entertainment.

Because that provided food on the table.

Every farthing was everything.

Today, every signed contract and every ten grand for 10 minutes or whatever is also everything.

But here's where the "reality" pursuit fits in nicely with the production companies well versed in making animal entertainment shows and not having to pay the stars.

Film real people life, on the streets, at immigration borders, in weird families, at restored homes, in kitchens and restaurants and the farthings are saved.

I like many, have been intrigued by the often unpredictable and unscripted live shows which get played out within some of the largest theatres in the world.

International airport terminals.

A common remark within many a conversation about such places is "you sure see some strange sights".

It is unavoidable because an international air terminal is a theatre for comings and goings.

Dramas and comedies.

Mysteries and intrigue - and when someone gets bailed up at the customs and immigration centre it's always an unpredictable show.

There are tears as emotional farewells and greetings are rolled out, and grimaces when some bloke has just remembered he left his passport back in the drawer at the motel he'd been staying in.

Or like us one one occasion as we prepared to depart Brisbane and I realised there was a small suitcase missing - the one which had the oddball craft beers I'd found in a local bottle store.

A quick call to the hotel, and the dispatch of a taxi with the case safely in it, did the trick, although it was a near-run thing.

All part of life's rich tapestry, and I daresay our looks of concern had other members of the international airport theatre intrigued and guessing.

My declaration that "thank God, the beer's arrived" would have sparked the head-scratching though.

And the thing about the great theatre of international arrivals and departures is that there is a new cast every day.

Casts of thousands.

Which means a great swathe of humanity takes to the stage.

For attending this theatre means one will be seated for some time, so unless one shuts the eyes and curls up on a soft chair by the bar one will watch.

Watch humanity at work.

So naturally, with an ever-evolving cast of thousands (who did not have to be paid) and an ever-evolving landscape of unscripted surprises, such a theatre had to be was well and truly in the sights of the television production teams.

There have been a few series now, focused on great airports out east and throughout Europe, and one of the established "theatres" is making a return this Wednesday night on TV1.

And like the past runs, it will feature some entertaining acts, for sure.

For as the title points out, Heathrow is Britain's busiest airport, and this "behind the scenes" reality theatre show tells me one thing.

No way could I work there.

So hats off (and applause perhaps) for those who have to deal with the evolving and often unpredictable casts of thousands who take the stage in such huge public theatres.

Heathrow: Britain's Busiest Airport, TV1 at 9.05pm Wednesday: My only memory of Heathrow International Airport was arriving there in late 77 to fly home after pursuing some motorcycle race adventures to discover the handlers had gone on a 24-hour strike.

Not a happy show on that occasion. You'll come across some interesting acts here though.

ON THE BOX

My Floating Home, Choice at 10pm Tuesday: Seems you don't need to own land to build a house. Just find a big old patch of sparkling water and get the builders round.

Which is the scenario for the couple who come into focus on this aptly-titled show did.

To escape the rat-race of frantic life in Seattle they went and took a look at a pretty little place called Maple Bay in Canada ... and reckon that might be the spot to set up home.

In a three-bedroom house upon the water. Hope they get the floors sealed okay.

Jurassic Park, TV3 at 7.30pm Friday: Yes, this has likely been screened a dozen or so times on telly since it first hits the big screen back in 1993.

That was a long time ago, with some kids probably thinking it was so long ago dinosaurs were probably still about.

I'm not too settled with movies on TV due to the ad-interruption factor, but this Spielberg effort is a true classic ... and the expression on Sam Neill's face when he first spots a grazing prehistoric giant is equally classic.