Bruce Bisset: Survey shows farce we face

LGC chairman Basil Morrison, left. Photo / Duncan Brown

Forget the increasingly bitter parochial arguments about amalgamation. It's now obvious the result is a foregone conclusion, as the farcical nature of what appears to be the Local Government Commission's "attitudinal survey" demonstrates.

One question. No options. No canvassing of opinions. Just a simple yes or no.

Here's that question, in its entirety, as received by email by a member of the public on Wednesday:

"Would you vote for or against a proposal for: A Hawke's Bay Council to cover Napier Wairoa Hastings and Central Hawke's Bay, which would take over the responsibilities of the Hawke's Bay Regional Council and have five boards and a Maori board, with headquarters in Napier?"

In short, asking people if they support the commission's existing "draft" proposal, as formulated late last year.

And this is to, in the words of LGC chairman Basil Morrison, "assist commissioners to understand the views of the public and the degree to which our proposal has support before we make our next decision in the process."

Pardon? In what way will simply asking if people agree to the draft help the commission decide whether " and how " to alter that proposal?

Mind you, at time of writing there was some doubt that this singular question comprised the "Colmar Brunton phone survey" the LGC intended carrying out, because it was received via email " although it did come from ConsumerLink, a company that describes Colmar Brunton as "our parent company".

If the commission wanted to create a backlash against amalgamation, they could do no worse than acting out their dictatorial pomposity in just this fashion.

Bruce Bisset

And as the email was received the same day the LGC's "guide for households" pamphlets started arriving in mailboxes " to be kept by the phone, they advise, in case the survey people ring - it seems likely that, yes, this is it and one question is all you get.

Provided you're one of just 2000 lucky folk who will have the chance to answer it.

Farce really isn't too strong a word, is it? Because no matter which side of the debate you favour, and regardless of whose assets are in better shape than whose, or whose debt is bigger, this astoundingly one-dimensional "survey" helps no one answer anything.

Still, I'm not surprised. I've already labelled the whole process a con job and this merely reinforces my opinion.

Funny thing is, if the commission wanted to create a backlash against amalgamation, they could do no worse than acting out their dictatorial pomposity in just this fashion. Bet the "pro" camp will be mangling their wallets over it.

That said, you'll notice the sweetener the commission snuck in, about Napier (where "antis" are prevalent) being the HQ for a unitary body. Before anyone is swayed by that, read the fine print: the pamphlet says "initially" in Napier. No guarantee, suckers.

Of course, pointless surveys aside, regardless of what final proposal the LGC comes out with, residents will still be able to force a poll on the issue and that vote will be binding " so even if the LGC is following a set-in-stone agenda, it can be rejected. Or accepted. We are, still, a democracy; we can " at least until the Trans Pacific Partnership Agreement is signed " still make our own choices.

Bottom line: whatever the LGC says it's only their opinion, no matter how forcefully put. Beat the drum hard enough and you'll just make people deaf.

And as naive and trusting as Kiwis can be in matters politic, if you rub our noses in something that looks smells and tastes like rubbish, chances are we'll tell you: yeah, nah.

That's the right of it.

Bruce Bisset is a freelance writer and poet.