If they have not got a complex about their ages, Amy (39) and Stu (46) might have by the end of this series.
They are the oldest couple (combined age) in the history of the show, the TV audience was reminded relentlessly, although Richardson might want to talk to the editor who added their ages together and came to 95 (not 85), as Richardson said on the show last night.
“Get us some zimmer frames and we’ll be right,” Stu said as they were introduced to New Zealand.
“We’re probably old enough to be their parents,” Amy said after they were introduced to their rivals.
Each team were given a brand-spanking new Suzuku Vitara Safari to use — “my first new car ever,” revealed Stu — and drove to The Block location, where numbered sledge hammers decided their respective reno houses.
The first room to be renovated is the guest bedroom and each couple was given a brief to follow for the room’s theme.
Stu and Amy got “moody botanical”.
“Woohoo, aweome,” they enthused.
“What’s botanical?” Stu asked.
The builders, organised by the teams well in advance, arrived. Amy and Stu’s is Gisborne chippie Dave Wallace.
They also got to meet the “head honcho” of the overall builds — Peter “The Wolf” Wolfkamp.
Architecture graduate Tom and project manager Ben made the sneaky move of buying The Wolf a gift, a motorbike book.
It earns them new names — “Brown” and “Tongue”.
This pair, however, look the team to beat. There’s a calculating and ruthless streak to them, particularly David Bain hand-me-down-jersey-wearing Tom, who bears a disturbing resemblance to Game of Thrones sadist Ramsay Bolton.
Brown and Tongue lived up to the team-to-watch suspicion by winning the first challenge, which involved answering questions about the history of Hobsonville Point, piecing together a jigsaw and plenty of running.
The latter is not Amy and Stu’s strong point.
“My lungs are burning and we’ve probably only run about 50 metres,” Amy admitted.
“I think we are more weights and stuff than cardio,” she said afterwards.
After getting down to what the show is supposed to be about, the teams then made up their temporary beds, with Em exclaiming in a 12-year-old schoolgirl voice: “This is just like a school camp times one million” . . . Almost as memorable as her earlier statement: “Tradies get the ladies”.
The show ended with a hunt for a hidden safe containing “a secret advantage”.
Teams agreed they could search other’s area but when Amy caught Agni in theirs when they had not finished looking, she promptly gave him the boot.
His whining reaction drew no sympathy from a woman wearing a Gizzy Hard shirt.
“Keep your panties on.”
One of the other team builders found the safe but Amy claimed she was the first competitor to see it, so it should go to them.
And that’s where episode one ended.
“A strange day on the block,” Richardson remarked.
